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#64254 - 01 Nov 07 12:54 The Point
Piss Salon Offline
Pujangga Besar

Registered: 27 Jun 06
Posts: 4039
Loc: Jakpus
Oh dear. Not to be outdone by the famous 'grayish whoppers' story, The Point(less) sees fit to publish this gem. I am having to type this in myself so I won't post it all. They obviously have no expatriate copy editors and, still, no brains.

The Anak Gunung Krakatau volcano in the middle of SUNDAY Strait continued to erupt and add more explosion spots at its cauldron, concerns have grown among many residents living near coastal areas of Anyer beach in Cinangka sub-district at the northern part of Banten provincial capital of Serang, that the smoke and ashes produced during the eruption could intoxicate their respiratory system.

Fuck, I would take a breath at this point but am concerned I will get intoxicated.

"As the volcano continues to erupt, the ashes would get thicker and thicker and if they're blown away towards us here, we will have inhale those toxic," said Banten Health Office Head Asep Misbach in Serang on Wednesday evening.

"Strong winds from the sea will likely send the toxic smoke here, reaching Anyer beach and Carita (in Pandeglang district) at any moment," Misbach warned.

Are you evacuating yet?

As such an alert status remained, there were no tourists to be allowed to climb and come near the volcano, at least until today.

Say what?

"We reckon that any product of an erupting volcano are dangerous to human," he said, adding "and that includes the ashes, which can be fatal to us."

Sounds serious.

However, until Wednesday there were no reports of casualties over the eruption incident.

Something about tourists.

"Many of them too a picture of it, using the eruptin scene as a background of their photo," he added.

And so on.
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#64255 - 01 Nov 07 12:56 Re: The Point [Re: Piss Salon]
Dilli Offline
Pujangga Besar

Registered: 26 Feb 06
Posts: 8044
Loc: Nearest Bar
Brilliant......

Pullyerknob Prize Material!
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#64256 - 01 Nov 07 13:00 Re: The Point [Re: Piss Salon]
chewwyUK Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 14 Sep 06
Posts: 2392
Loc: Jakarta
funniest thing i have read in a while ... no defending the point anymore. JP must love seeing that.
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Edited by Piss Salon
Edit Reason: taste

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#64257 - 01 Nov 07 13:07 Re: The Point [Re: chewwyUK]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
the indonesians at the Post would see absolutely nothing wrong with that article.
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#64258 - 01 Nov 07 13:16 Re: The Point [Re: KuKuKaChu]
riccardo Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 12 Oct 05
Posts: 2195
Loc: Jakarta
Two things I've heard on the topic of English papers here:

1. Jim Van Zorge (of the Van Zorge report) is said to be starting a daily paper

2. JP is hiring 1 "writer" and 1 "senior writer" -- both must send in recent photo and copy of TOEFL score over 500 (which can barely get you a beer in an English-speaking country. For comparison, most good universities in English-speaking countries require that foreign students have a minimum score of 650)

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#64260 - 01 Nov 07 13:19 Re: The Point [Re: riccardo]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
Quoting: riccardo
1. Jim Van Zorge (of the Van Zorge report) is said to be starting a daily paper

so he may beat me to it ... not that i intend to have anything to do with newsprint.
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#64261 - 01 Nov 07 13:28 Re: The Point [Re: KuKuKaChu]
Dilli Offline
Pujangga Besar

Registered: 26 Feb 06
Posts: 8044
Loc: Nearest Bar
The Jakarta equivalent to "The Sun"

Page three & the tits?


Attachments
medieval bird with tits.jpg


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#64296 - 02 Nov 07 06:44 Re: The Point [Re: Dilli]
Dilli Offline
Pujangga Besar

Registered: 26 Feb 06
Posts: 8044
Loc: Nearest Bar
I sent this excerpt to my brother last night. Surprisingly, he did not find it funny. (Irony, he's dyslexic and understood it)
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#64313 - 02 Nov 07 09:22 Re: The Point [Re: Dilli]
Piss Salon Offline
Pujangga Besar

Registered: 27 Jun 06
Posts: 4039
Loc: Jakpus
The photo under the story of a man pulling a recycling cart full of used tyres.

To be vulcanized!

A scavenger drags his cart full of used tires, passing in front of Hotel Indonesia traffic circle here. Pictured with the water fountain as background, the man who claimed to be a tire specialist later said he ould have those tires vulcanized and re-sell them to truck or bus drivers.
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place within us love that truly gives, tenderness that truly unites, self-offering that tells the truth and does not deceive, forgiveness that truly receives, loving physical union that welcomes

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#64315 - 02 Nov 07 09:28 Re: The Point [Re: Piss Salon]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
a scavenger tyre specialist ... hmmm ...

god we need a decent english-language news media ... anyone out there got a bankroll? USD100,000 will get the ball rolling.


Edited by KuKuKaChu (02 Nov 07 09:29)
Edit Reason: USD
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#64316 - 02 Nov 07 09:29 Re: The Point [Re: Piss Salon]
Piss Salon Offline
Pujangga Besar

Registered: 27 Jun 06
Posts: 4039
Loc: Jakpus
By popular demand:

A herd of wild elephants coming in tens of them, have been obtruding Balairaja subdistrict in Riau since weekend, and the number increased to more than forty as of Monday.

The elephants' rush caused local residents to remain nervous and uneasy for those wild animals, honking their trunks while intruding into the village, have damaged four resident houses, eaten plants at the community gardens and undoubtedly scared of the people around.

"I saw them with my naked eyes, at least there were forty of these mammals with long prehensile trunks really vandalizing our civilization," a Balairaja residents muttered.

Local authorities were reported to not have taken any necessary actions regarding this elephants flee and rather leaving it up to the villagers.

At least seven families were forced to move out of the region due this perturbation, including those whose house crunched by that stampede of large tife-toed animals of the Elephantidae family.

"We feel terrorized by these grayish whoppers, particularly during the night. As people sleep these big ivory monsters wake us up,"said Freddy Simbolon, a Balairaja resident as reported by Antara.

Simbolon has moved his wife and children leaving the villlage.

He and some other adult male inhabitants remained, gearing up for lest the unexpected comeback of the elephants, at anytime.

Another villager whose house was completely smashed by a mass invasion of these four-legged jumbos with tusks claimed that his family were already evacuated.

"Look at my house! It's gone. These animals have eaten anything including my house," he angered.

"Awhile ago, two big elephants collapsed my house, and they just disappeared behind the bush and came back to gluttonously eat the major of rice fields in the subdistrict," Simbolon raised his voice raggedly.
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place within us love that truly gives, tenderness that truly unites, self-offering that tells the truth and does not deceive, forgiveness that truly receives, loving physical union that welcomes

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#64317 - 02 Nov 07 09:31 Re: The Point [Re: Piss Salon]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
a true classic!
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