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#35455 - 04 Nov 06 02:22 What is a casual dating?
dorian_gray Offline
Member

Registered: 04 Nov 06
Posts: 2
Loc: Jakarta
Im confused with this term. Couple months ago i dated a guy (he's not Indonesian) for about three months. We saw each other on a regular basis. Then one day, i asked him what was going on between us, and he replied "we're on casual dating, it means that we can see other people."

If you date the same person almost every work, can we call it as casual dating? Did i do soemthing wrong with asked him the question? did it scared him? Or he's just not into me (that's what i thought).


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#35456 - 04 Nov 06 02:27 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: dorian_gray]
Dilli Offline
Pujangga Besar

Registered: 26 Feb 06
Posts: 8044
Loc: Nearest Bar
I know casual sex is when the girl is bouncing up and down while you watch the football on TV
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#35457 - 04 Nov 06 02:29 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: Dilli]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
your guy is a slut. smile
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#35458 - 04 Nov 06 02:33 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: dorian_gray]
chewwyUK Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 14 Sep 06
Posts: 2392
Loc: Jakarta
hmmm ... allow me to answer this one. You did nothing wrong - he is still at the kid in candy store stage and cant bring himself to just be with the one girl. Its a problem a lot of men have when they first come to asia -- with time it will pass
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Edited by Piss Salon
Edit Reason: taste

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#35461 - 04 Nov 06 03:08 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: dorian_gray]
AriesRabbit Offline
Member+

Registered: 18 Aug 06
Posts: 82
Loc: Jakarta for Now
Quoting: dorian_gray

If you date the same person almost every work, can we call it as casual dating?



Depend on situation, yes you still can say that its casual dating. Nowdays society are different than the old timers (I mean Asian), where you can't have so called one-size-fit-all definition of dating.

Casual Dating can be define as where both party is seeing each another often, but no firm or full commitment in term of love and feeling. You can consider that is a step before actual dating, where both party will actually try to find each another common goal.

Most of the Asian people, believe that "dating" start, where one person start going out with another person more often, like the old timers. I believe that there are some countries in Asia still value the traditional definition (eg. Indonesia).

Whereas for most of the so called western countries, due to culture differences, they will actually source for more information and evaluate before making a commitment to the actual "dating". This will involve a lot of things like the actual "dating" couples does, but not to the extend in term of emotion, thinking and feeling. So bewarn, even if you have sex with him doesn't mean that his your "steady" pacar. Thats why you have the terms of Teman Tapi Mesra (TTM) or in western called f**k buddy.

So don't think that you have scare him or he is not into you. As he is a bule, is quite natural to them, to search a common ground that both of you have in order for him to move forward.
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"Love is Obsolate, Romance is Temporary, Sex is Forever"

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#35462 - 04 Nov 06 03:31 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: dorian_gray]
D'ruby Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 13 Feb 06
Posts: 2177
Loc: My
Quoting: dorian_gray
Then one day, i asked him what was going on between us, and he replied "we're on casual dating, it means that we can see other people."



When the guys said something like that, just take it easy, you have options, take it or leave it. Don't take it seriously and don't fall in love with him smile
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I wanna be Samantha, but I am so Carrie

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#35482 - 04 Nov 06 04:51 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: AriesRabbit]
Shesca Offline
Member*

Registered: 12 Aug 06
Posts: 852
Loc: Jakarta
Quoting: AriesRabbit
Quoting: dorian_gray

If you date the same person almost every work, can we call it as casual dating?



Depend on situation, yes you still can say that its casual dating. Nowdays society are different than the old timers (I mean Asian), where you can't have so called one-size-fit-all definition of dating.

Casual Dating can be define as where both party is seeing each another often, but no firm or full commitment in term of love and feeling. You can consider that is a step before actual dating, where both party will actually try to find each another common goal.

Most of the Asian people, believe that "dating" start, where one person start going out with another person more often, like the old timers. I believe that there are some countries in Asia still value the traditional definition (eg. Indonesia).

Whereas for most of the so called western countries, due to culture differences, they will actually source for more information and evaluate before making a commitment to the actual "dating". This will involve a lot of things like the actual "dating" couples does, but not to the extend in term of emotion, thinking and feeling. So bewarn, even if you have sex with him doesn't mean that his your "steady" pacar. Thats why you have the terms of Teman Tapi Mesra (TTM) or in western called f**k buddy.

So don't think that you have scare him or he is not into you. As he is a bule, is quite natural to them, to search a common ground that both of you have in order for him to move forward.


ERRRRRR...... NO MORE COMMENT. PERFECT EXPLANATION.
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#35483 - 04 Nov 06 05:08 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: Shesca]
AriesRabbit Offline
Member+

Registered: 18 Aug 06
Posts: 82
Loc: Jakarta for Now
Hopefully offended no one..especially bule grin
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"Love is Obsolate, Romance is Temporary, Sex is Forever"

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#35560 - 06 Nov 06 05:43 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: AriesRabbit]
Diyu Offline
Member+++

Registered: 12 Nov 05
Posts: 324
Loc: new zealand
Hopefully offended no one..especially bule grin



I am totaly offended cos cannot understand one bloody word of it
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#35569 - 06 Nov 06 14:55 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: Diyu]
Squirrel Offline
Member+

Registered: 05 Nov 06
Posts: 48
at least he was honest about it. The guys to worry about are the ones who deny it.

Every man sleeps around. some are more brazen than others!

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#35587 - 07 Nov 06 02:33 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: D'ruby]
Jokie Jokie Girl Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 07 Nov 05
Posts: 2552
Loc: Central Jakarta
Quoting: D'ruby
Quoting: dorian_gray
Then one day, i asked him what was going on between us, and he replied "we're on casual dating, it means that we can see other people."



When the guys said something like that, just take it easy, you have options, take it or leave it. Don't take it seriously and don't fall in love with him smile


for me; leave it and find the ne one wink
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"I am the Island girl, born with the humble life, eat on the floor with the right hand"

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#35593 - 07 Nov 06 03:31 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: Jokie Jokie Girl]
dorian_gray Offline
Member

Registered: 04 Nov 06
Posts: 2
Loc: Jakarta
I'll learn my lesson smile I think Jokie2 Girl is right, i should move on.

Thanks for AriesRabbit who gave very comprehensive explanation.


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#35595 - 07 Nov 06 04:38 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: Squirrel]
Macan Tutul Offline
Pujangga Muda

Registered: 02 Dec 05
Posts: 1502
Loc: Jungle and cage ;)
Quoting: Adolph Hitler
at least he was honest about it. The guys to worry about are the ones who deny it.

Every man sleeps around. some are more brazen than others!


Adolph Hitler? Is that you my dear Adolph from the past? grin whistle
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" Don't be shy with yourself, you have lots of talent without you notice....that's human, just be who you are."

(Memoirs of 3/3/2007)

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#35596 - 07 Nov 06 04:52 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: Macan Tutul]
Dilli Offline
Pujangga Besar

Registered: 26 Feb 06
Posts: 8044
Loc: Nearest Bar
Think it may well be so MT
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#35597 - 07 Nov 06 05:04 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: Dilli]
Macan Tutul Offline
Pujangga Muda

Registered: 02 Dec 05
Posts: 1502
Loc: Jungle and cage ;)
Halouw Dili, how lifes goin'? I need Adolph's Luger now...
_________________________
" Don't be shy with yourself, you have lots of talent without you notice....that's human, just be who you are."

(Memoirs of 3/3/2007)

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#35600 - 07 Nov 06 05:53 Re: What is a casual dating? [Re: Macan Tutul]
Polar Bear Offline
Pujangga Besar

Registered: 23 Nov 05
Posts: 6177
BOLLOCKS to Adolph the left wing socialist trendy. I mean - 6 million in five years. You gotta do better than that to be a legend in your own bath water.......

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