Or in this case, "indeed I shall be fatwa-ing in your general direction my good sir.." as you bend your head side to side.

In keeping with the "holy month" we have a nice Fatwa-for-cash scandal...

Fatwas are iSlamic religious rulings, not just death sentences for hapless writers like Salman Rushdie but also directives about the minutiae of daily life. And clerics seem to derive their mandate to issue fatwas from the fact that they issue fatwas. There is no central organization to ensure fatwa quality, relevance, or even sanity.

Last week, many muzzies in India, like their counterparts around the world, gathered on the streets to burn effigies of the Pope and shout slogans denouncing him for his remarks on iSlam and violence. Even before that fully died out, however, a new controversy erupted — one that has turned muzzie ire against some of their own local clerics.

India’s “cash-for-fatwas” scandal broke out last weekend when a TV channel broadcast a sting operation that showed several Indian muzzie clerics taking, or demanding, bribes in return for issuing fatwas. The bribes, some of which were as low as $60, were offered by undercover reporters wearing hidden cameras over a period of six weeks. In return for the cash, the clerics then handed out any type of fatwa requested.

Among the decrees issued by the fatwas: that muzzies are not allowed to use credit cards, double beds, or camera-equipped cell phones, and should not act in films, donate their organs, or teach their children English. One cleric issued a fatwa against watching TV; another issued a fatwa in support of watching TV.

Adding to the shock in India, home to the world’s third-largest Muslim population (approximately 150 million), is that some of the clerics apparently caught in the sting operation teach at important institutions — one belongs to India’s most famous Islamic seminary, the Darul Uloom at Deoband.
Just here proffering my pearls to swine, my throat to wolves and my trousers to the flagpole.