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#2106 - 08 Nov 05 16:02 For all those Accountant out there ........ :-)
ivands Offline
Member+

Registered: 07 Nov 05
Posts: 51
Loc: Jakarta
For all those Accountant out there ........ :-)


I have a professional woman as my wife; a Chartered Accountant. She uses LIFO method while taking out the refrigerated food.

She thinks I am no good with numbers. Fine with me, for now she handles the budget of the house. Initially she used to send me a bill at the month end, but when I told her that I am not her client but her husband, she asks for the money in advance. The expenses had been rising steadily over the months, so one day I snooped into the papers maintained in a current file.

No wonder! She was charging mileage and overtime to the house budget.

She is crazy, I tell her but she corrects me. No honey, I am the auditor. I fail to see the light.

Every scrap of the paper in our house is filed. She tells me as per some Ordinance she must keep a copy of every thing for at least ten years before destroying it. I am worried.

The other day we had an hour-long fight. Later, I got to know that she had charged that hour to a client of hers, in the time sheet. My time was put down as unoccupied.

She says that she loves me and I tell her that I love her too. However, she never believes me. She says that there is susceptibility of it being a misstatement. Duh! She wants my representation on this!

Last year our house accounts got a qualified opinion I had not kept the supporting etc. of my purchases. Not a long time back my brotherís wedding was to be solemnized. Wedding cards had been sent.

After some time I started receiving a steady trickle of letters. I was puzzled until my wife explained that external evidence was more reliable. She had called for confirmations from all those to whom cards were sent.

When she cooks: my wife at times does not go by recipe. Where the recipe says add half-teaspoon vinegar,one tsp black salt or one teacup of water, she ignores them. She says that they are not material when taken in context of whole meal being prepared.

She is crazy, I tell you. Surprisingly everybody calls her an auditor, instead. I checked the dictionary and it did not state that auditor is a synonym for crazy. The dictionary must be outdated.

When we got married, she had given me an Engagement Letter and I Had said how cute-how sweet. Now she gives it to me every year saying that her standards state that it must be sent anew if there is any indication that I have misunderstood the objective and scope of engagement. Huh!

Apart from sending me the engagement letter once again she says I canít get rid of her just like that. She says that she has the right of being heard before I appoint some one else.

Phew! For a minute, I thought that we had jeopardized our going concern status. Duh! Dare I say so??

I am told by one of my female colleagues who is married to a CA that the scenario is even worse when the guy is a CA. Apparently he capitalised the wedding expenses as preliminary expenses and is writing it off every year.Also the time he spent dating his wife before marrying her is still under consideration for valuation...valuation of intangible assets.

So guyz please think twice....should u really marry a

CA? and yes please discount it by the appropriate rate

to arrive at the present value of the risk of doing so

!!!!!!!



(An Auditee for life)
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i

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#110823 - 31 May 10 16:35 Re: For all those Accountant out there ........ :-) [Re: ivands]
stupid Offline
Member

Registered: 31 May 10
Posts: 1
Loc: Indonesia
Dr XXXXXXXXXXXXXX is a known con man and fraudster. Posing as a millionaire, he runs various Ponzi style get rich quick schemes, none of which are regulated by financial authorities. If he approaches you with an investment opportunity, report him to the authorities immediately. He trades under the names The XXXX Club, XXXXXXXXXXX Investments or XXXXXXXXXXX, a now defunct car hire business in the UK. Under no circumstances should you give him any money. There are many angry investors trying to track him down, as well as the UK authorities. His web site at XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXx no longer carries any contact details, and you will not find any information on the suspect on the internet.


Edited by KuKuKaChu (27 Sep 10 14:22)
Edit Reason: person claims to have been defamed

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#110831 - 31 May 10 17:52 Re: For all those Accountant out there ........ :-) [Re: stupid]
adelina Offline
Member*

Registered: 17 Mar 09
Posts: 559
Loc: in your heart
thanks fyi, stu :-)
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