Myth?

Posted by: Piss Salon

Myth? - 29 May 07 18:44

Stolen from http://www.livescience.com/history/top10_intelligent_designs-1.html, which lists 'The Top 10 Intelligent Designs (or Creation Myths)'

This is number 1. Is there anyway this sounds like a plausible story to anyone with at least half a brain?

The Genesis of the Judeo-Christian and Islamic Faiths

Genesis, the first book of the Jewish Torah and the Christian Bible, contains two origin stories, both of which are accepted as the creation of the world by today's Jewish, Christian and Islamic faiths.

In the first, God says, "Let there be light," and light appears. In six days, he creates the sky, the land, plants, the sun and moon, animals, and all creatures, including humans. To all he says, "Be fruitful and multiply," which they do. On the seventh day God rests, contemplates his handiwork, and gives himself a good evaluation.

In the second story, God creates the first man, Adam, from the earth. He makes a garden in Eden for Adam, but forbids him to eat fruit from the "Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil."

Adam names the animals but remains lonely. God anesthetizes Adam and makes one of his ribs into the first woman, Eve. A talking serpent persuades her to eat the forbidden fruit, and she convinces Adam to do likewise. When God finds out, he drives them from the garden and makes man mortal.

Hmmmnmm!
Posted by: Dilli

Myth? Or Flying Fish Supper - 30 May 07 04:54

Let us remember that there are multiple theories of Intelligent Design. I and many others around the world are of the strong belief that the universe was created by a Flying Fish Supper which we call ďHimĒ. It was He who created all that we see and all that we feel.

I and others like me feel strongly that the overwhelming scientific evidence pointing towards evolutionary processes is nothing but a coincidence, put in place by Him.

It is for this reason that Iím writing this reply to Mr Salon, to formally request that this alternative theory be considered in this forum , along with the other two theories.

In fact, I will go so far as to say, if you do not agree to do this, I will be forced to proceed with legal action. Iím sure you see where I am coming from.

If the Intelligent Design theory is not based on faith, but instead another scientific theory, as is claimed, then you must also allow my theory to be taught, as it is also based on science, not on faith.

Some find that hard to believe, so it may be helpful to tell you a little more about my beliefs. I have evidence that a Flying Fish Supper created the universe. None of us, of course, were around to see it, but there are written accounts of it. I have several lengthy volumes explaining all details of His power.

Also, you may be surprised to hear that there are over 10 million of us, believing in the almighty Flying Fish Supper and his pantheons of Deep Fried Mars Bars.

We tend to be very secretive, as many people claim our beliefs are not substantiated by observable evidence. What these people donít understand is that He built the world to make us think the earth is older than it really is.

For example, a scientist may perform a carbon-dating process on an artifact. He finds that approximately 75% of the Carbon-14 has decayed by electron emission to Nitrogen-14, and infers that this artifact is approximately 10,000 years old, as the half-life of Carbon-14 appears to be 5,730 years.

But what our scientist does not realize is that every time he makes a measurement, the Flying Fish Supper is there changing the results with His deep fried Sacred Appendages.

We have numerous texts that describe in detail how this can be possible and the reasons why He does this.

He is of course invisible and can pass through normal matter with ease.

I rest my case.

Here is an actual picture drawn 100 Million Years ago as proof.
Posted by: Dilli

Re: Myth? Or Flying Fish Supper - 30 May 07 04:58

Sacrement with chalices of the annointed Eldorado and Electric Soup will be available at Lippo Karawaci on the 3rd June from 10AM onwards.
Posted by: Piss Salon

Re: Myth? Or Flying Fish Supper - 30 May 07 17:33

What about this one?

Among these advanced teachings, one episode revealed to those who reach OT level III is the story of Xenu and his Galactic Confederacy. Xenu (sometimes Xemu) is introduced as an alien ruler of the "Galactic Confederacy" who, 75 million years ago, brought billions of people to Earth in spacecraft resembling Douglas DC-8 airliners, stacked them around volcanoes and blew them up with hydrogen bombs. Their souls then clustered together and stuck to the bodies of the living. [These freaks] believe the alien souls continue to do this today, causing a variety of physical ill-effects in modern-day humans. [Evil cult leader] called these clustered spirits "Body Thetans", and the advanced levels place considerable emphasis on isolating them and neutralizing their ill effects.
Posted by: Piss Salon

Re: Myth? Or Flying Fish Supper - 30 May 07 19:34

We know Tom Cruise, John Travolta etc are scientologists, but here is a list of the top 10 unknown scientologists:

http://www.cracked.com/index.php?name=News&sid=1994&pageid=1
Posted by: Capt. Mainwaring

Re: Myth? Or Flying Fish Supper - 30 May 07 19:38

Quoting: Piss Salon
We know Tom Cruise, John Travolta etc are scientologists, but here is a list of the top 10 unknown scientologists:

http://www.cracked.com/index.php?name=News&sid=1994&pageid=1


Do you reckon they would be scientologists if they were potless ?
Posted by: Piss Salon

Re: Myth? Or Flying Fish Supper - 30 May 07 19:48

Are you asking if marijuana played a role in their conversions? Perhaps. What are Christians'/Muslims' excuses? Too many dates?
Posted by: Capt. Mainwaring

Re: Myth? Or Flying Fish Supper - 30 May 07 20:09

Looking at them , I think it may well have been something much stronger .
Posted by: Piss Salon

Re: Myth? Or Flying Fish Supper - 30 May 07 20:22

Bart's definitely on crack.