Please have a look-see, if you wanna chow down in town. (Ir)regulary updated.
The Review Ninja

Worst. Blog. Ever.

Biggest. Fattest. Wanker.

Now, look here - I may masturbate, I may carry a few extra pounds and I may be abrasive, but in no way does that make me... oh. Fair play.

:-)

Hahaha.

And Marmz,I quite liked your reviews.

I keep hearing about this blog. Where is it?

AAAAH FUCK. MY EYES! That black background...ohhh my dinner...

Nice reviews though...

You read 20,000 words in 14 minutes?

i think he just looked at the pictures.

hmmm. there are no pictures.

well, maybe he just picked up the look-and-feel by osmosis.

There are pictures, sometimes, when i can be arsed or am allowed.

I read three or four reviews. That was enough to imprint that yellow text on my vision for two hours. I thought I was being attacked by bees! You try reading it on a 32 inch tv.

I love how you keep track of how many words you've written! It is a lot but you've got a nice, easy style that I am already familiar with, so it wasn't a chore to read...

On the serious side, I would consult this blog were I to opt for a nice night out in a restaurant or for other practical purposes. Say, if I had a particularly bad case of insomnia.

I remember a certain B.D., who used to work at TBI, once had a great idea for a hospitality consultancy that would specialise in customer service training. Bad service seems to be endemic
in Jakarta. Perhaps we should get together and form some sort of training school for hospitality workers?

Yes. Me read good. Me can read lots of big words too. Me got favourite book. It called "Dick and Jane." Me like coz there is lots of pretty pictures and only little words.

Me like "Dick in Jane" best. Not mind where.

That may have actually been the correct title...

Sure it wasn't Dick in John? :-p

Restaurants covered so far this year are:
A Gran Melia
Amigo's
Brewww
Buddha Bar
Cazbar
Chameleon
Eastern Promise
Front Page
Glass Lounge
Hacienda
Immigrant
IndoChine
J.W. Marriott
Kinara
Loca!
Loewy
Moya
Ottimo Deli
Poste
Potato Head
Rustique
Social House
Ti Amo
The Apartment
Times Square
Tony Roma's
Toscana
Trattoria
VIN+
YaUdah

with many more following in the coming months.

May i suggest a review of Elbow Room in Kemang? Gastro Pub that stocks some good Belgium beers as well as those fruit beers you like so much. Recommend the Raspberry beer. Goods food on offer as well including the hard to find Cheese Fondue. Downstairs looks a little bland and cold but upstairs is nice and relaxing with big plush sofas to plank yourself in.

Took the Mrs there on Saturday and we liked it. Unfortunately my Mrs lightly vomited hers in the corner of De Hooi shortly after arriving. She says it wasnt the food, just the sight of Dilli after he had been enjoying free beers for 5 hours.

Its just next to Nu China if you are going marmz - book a table upstairs

Its a done deal, Mr Chew. How could I not take food recommendations from a chap with a name like yours?
As for fruit beers, it surprised me that I liked them. I was determined to hate them.
Thanks for some constructive feedback. Unlike

Don't get all paranoid Marmz. I believe somewhere at sometime I said I enjoyed your reviews. Do you want me to say it again? I didn't take you for the type of guy who needs constant reassurance.

There it is even.

I'm only pulling yer plonker. Yesterday's on Cazbar was admittedly scandalously puff, but it got me some much needed linkage.

Linkage?

Links from external sources - a useful method of getting traffic to the site.

goat sex

I love jesus

Do you think it's easy becoming a review ninja? Marmz had to go through an intensive training regime. Luckily for us mere mortals, some bootleg footage has just been leaked.

Watch and learn, Piss-san.

If the face was covered with a ninja mask you would swear this was Marmz!! Some of the movements look like his dancing in EP!!

I watched all of that. Marmz is awesome.

I am, aren't I.

Loads of new restaurant reviews!
:: !Review Ninja! ::

The soufflé was as flaccid as an Irishman's Bintang induced brewer's droop. One star out of five.

How many were written sober?

He's so fastidious in his acerbic critiques of restaurant service...neglecting to mention that he turns up ripped to his not so tiny tits to most of these places and then urinates on the hors d'œuvres.

New Look!
New sleeker formatted ninja-ry.
Please check out the site below and leave a comment.

Damp hors d'œuvres again.

"The waiting staff were surly and insubordinate. I mean I'd only drained me spuds on the prawn cocktail"

The critic's special sauce. Yummy!

Not only does the internet love Marmalade, but I am falling out of favour.

Too fucking true.

Reviewed today: Canteen@Pacific Place, SCBD
Last 10 Ninja attacks:
Marche Restaurant
Foodism Restaurant
Capocaaccia Sandwich and Bar
Flanagans Bar and Restaurant
Vegas Jakarta Bar and Restaurant
Black Cat Jazz Supper Club
BirdCage Restaurant and Bar
Avorio Restaurant and Bar
Orleans 'The Singing Bistro' Restaurant
Tartine Bar and Restaurant

This site has now moved away from the blogger platform and is now on wordpress at the address in my signature. Would appreciate (constructive) comments.

Nona Bola reviewed on jakartarestaurantreviews.wordpress.com

Ganesha Kemang, Bebek Mama Yo and Y&Y all recently reviewed... Round town with JRR

Chili's, Jakarta (I know, we've all been there!) reviewed on http://JakartaRestaurantReviews.com

Cardamon reviewed at JakartaRestaurantReviews!

Not much feedback.

Get it. Feed back.

Food reviews. Responses.

Fuck you all.

Thats hilarious. I am currently sitting in a pool of my own urine.

Get food and review. nice web.

Cheers, dude.

I AM A TROLL.

Life is toO short to spell 'too' correctly.