An Ungrateful Australian
Gary Dean, July 2001
Reference: http://www.okusi.net/garydean/works/ungrateful.html

On Tuesday, 17 December 2002 BM wrote:

> I think, on balance, that if I am to be ruled, I would much rather be
> ruled by complete fucking moron civilians than by clever army generals,
> or religious fanatics for that matter.
> A friend, who had been a lifelong marxist until the collapse of the
> Soviet Union, in a moment of possibly alcohol-induced candour, said to
> me once that to him a slightly corrupt, partially inept  'liberal
> democracy' is far preferable to a ruthlessly efficient and thoroughly
> honest socialist dictatorship.

Oh shit, I think I feel a polemic coming on ... Or maybe it's that dodgy rendang I ate for lunch ...


I quite agree, living under a liberal democracy is probably preferable to living under a socialist dictatorship. However your statements are loaded with some highly contentious and suspect presumptions concerning the alleged relative superiority of liberal democracy, of which Australia is a worthy representative. You seem to be inferring that living in Australia is clearly and infinitely more preferable to living in a state governed by "clever army generals" and/or "religious fanatics". (In the context above, you seemed to be alluding to Indonesia.)

OK, here's my argument: Australia sucks and Indonesia doesn't. (Sorry, I'm trying to get to the point quickly. Some of my readers have very short attention spans.) Australia is an anal-retentive, puritanical, hyper-bureaucratic society that craves certainty from cradle to grave. The notion we call "Australia" is in fact a highly effective dictatorship hiding behind a mask of pluralism and social democracy. The Australian state (yes, it's a singular animal despite federal pretensions) uses political correctness, law and hyper-regulation as weapons of repression. And woe be unto the unbelievers!

This is me being arrested for singing
a song of dubious artistic merit.
Perth, 5 December 1980.

Australia is ruled by a pseudo-meritocratic "professional" class that has absolute hegemony over political and cultural expression. Australian pluralism co-opts and/or suffocates non-conformists in a blanket of condescending, phoney toleration and smirking supremacism. And if that doesn't work then they can always call the cops.


Australia is the land of the living dead, a bizarre Disneyland of self-deception and self-congratulation. Not much different really from
any other modern, Western or Westernised "civilisation" on the planet at this present moment. As was said in the End of Prehistory a quarter of a century ago, we (Westerners) have succeeded in creating societies where "the possibility of dying from starvation has been replaced with the certainty of dying from boredom."

Like other Echelon Alliance states, Australia shares the spoils of economic and technological domination, and is an active participant in perpetuating the global class system that sucks the very life out of "backward", unmodernised states and regions. And then attempts to present itself as a model of virtue and righteousness to our little brown brothers to the north.

Australians are the most annoying people on the planet (myself and present company excluded of course). They are an embarrassment to the human species. I go out of my way to avoid them. Truly, I'm not
exaggerating.


I used to think that perhaps there was something wrong with me, perhaps I wasn't getting something. But now I am convinced that it's Australia that's fucked, not me. If I never go back to Australia in my life I will
not feel that I have missed anything whatsoever. Living in Australia is like death itself, the arrogant, self-satisfied culture that daily proclaims that "we have arrived, we are there", utterly and smugly impervious to criticism and non-conforming thought.

I came to Indonesia over seven years ago, following three years of deliberate and fairly intensive preparation and planning. I rarely go back to Australia nowadays, and if I do it is a very quick trip and usually only for mercenary purposes.

People, both Western and Indonesian, sometimes say to me "You must love Indonesia." This, I guess, is a reasonable assumption on their part. But in fact, I don't "love" Indonesia. I'm ambivalent, frankly. Sure, the political sideshows here tickle certain small areas of my brain. And certainly, culturally there is a lot that this place can teach you about humanity. But truly, I live here because this is where I live. And most importantly, I live here because it's not Australia.

The past seven years have been "interesting times" in this part of the world. For me personally it has also been eventful. I have seen the departure of three Indonesian presidents, witnessed several waves of severe political tumult (and seen two people killed as a consequence), been victim of a number of robberies (once even inflicted a double hernia jumping from a moving town bus whilst escaping an group of angry pickpockets), been hospitalised on two occasions for months at a time with interesting tropical diseases, witnessed numerous traffic fatalities, had my house flooded to the kneecaps twice, and have been continuously and mercilessly ripped off by corrupt immigration bureaucrats. And currently I am in the process of being hunted down by a Chinese mafia gang in Jakarta because I threw a spanner into the works of their multi-million dollar sugar smuggling operation.

Not to mention volcanic eruptions, earthquakes, landslides, murderous traffic, air pollution, endemic corruption, political leaders of mega-moronic intellect, Islamic and ethnic terrorism, and an investment climate that has all but obliterated Indonesia from the global economic map. Keeping in mind that I'm supposed to be an "Indonesian Investment Consultant", this last point is of considerable importance to me personally! Very simply, no investment, no income! Given my profession, you can probably imagine that I've been about as popular as a umm ... [insert your own
hilariously witty metaphor here].


But for all the above, I'm still here in Indonesia. Why? Once again, because it's not Australia. At least here I know I'm alive; in Australia I can never be quite sure. "Life" in Australia is a numbing blur of certainty, repetition and sterility. In contrast, every moment in Indonesia requires complete attention. Nothing can be left to chance, you cannot "cruise" within your own personal oblivion. Anything and everything can and does happen.

When Indonesians -- or any East Asians for that matter -- think about Australia and Australians, they nearly always use words with meanings such as "arrogant", "supremacist", "racist", amongst others. I used to think that they simply didn't understand Australians or their culture, or that they were simply victims of nationalist propaganda. Actually, they don't understand Australians, and in fact most do simply regurgitate the bigoted propaganda that's fed to them through nationalist media. But despite this I now consider that they have accurately described Australia and Australians.


Of course, the boringly predictable Australian response to such sharp criticism is to splutter something like "well, my country is better than yours, so there!" Australians may go on to proclaim, subtly or otherwise: "we are rich, we have powerful friends, we are white, we are a tolerant multicultural society, our social system is second to none." ... To which I can only reply: "So fucking what?"

Btw, what do you think the chances are of seeing any of the opinions above published in The West Australian? Right, zilch. And it's not just because The West Australian is a narrow-minded, provincial, rubbish wrapper. The fact is that very, very few Australians want to hear such opinions. They are prisoners of their own self-deceptions and the hegemony of the ruling culture.

"As we celebrate Christmas, let us think of the incredible privilege we all have of being Australians." -- Australian Prime Minister John Howard, December 2002.

Ummm, yeah, right, thanks John for the "incredible privilege". I am such an ungrateful sod.

I will be grateful if I dont get deported to Serbia, or the Phillipines,or indeed remain locked up away for 2 weeks for sedition in some nice asio safe house, or if the federal police do not hand me over to the indo police in Bali whilst I am attempting a drug run. I will also be grateful if I could resume my underwear modelling career in between my coversion to islam( it must have been the ecstasy)and my dance party schedule.

ah .... so someone actually gets the point of this diatribe? Not many australians do, frankly.

Yes we are usually too busy making sure our whippersnippers and investment properties are bigger than our neighbours( as long as they are white neighbours)
Sometimes I am ashamed to be australian .And Im very ashamed Honest Johnny purports to speak for the majority.

Honest John DOES speak for the majority. He was elected with a MASSIVE majority, and polls conducted at regualar periods since then have consistently shown him to bbe the most popular PM. He has a clear mandate.

the minority (moron-ity) of people who disagree could always move elsewhere. i can provide a substantial list of countries where they would be more happy.

Incidentally, i bet 500 dollars that the dumb ass who wrote the diatribe has'nt given up his good old aussie passport...... Wanker par excellence!

The author of the article I am told has not been back to Australia for years, mate. But I doubt very much he has a new passport. Much too hard in Indonesia. Can cost Rp200 million for a foreign guy to get citizenship here.

They already have mate, they already have. Good ol ozzie brain-drain.

500 dollars says the wanker holds onto his Australian passport. This sort of guy makes me sick. Bitches about the country, how bad it is.

Australia isnt perfect, but its a hell of a lot better than most places I have lived in. Death squads don't roam the streets, no one is forced into military service, medical care is free, pensions are provided to the aged. Anti polution laws exists, everyone is eaqual, education is free, unemployed get paid an alowance, everyone votes.

but of course no non of the counts for a squirt of pee on a wet day when it comes to Hating Howard.

maybe is the tosser had been born in some 3rd world shit hole and dies of malnutrition he would be more happy.

No-John Howard is absolutely irresponsible with his so called mandate, I am not a moron, nor would I give up my passport.I live in a blue ribbon liberal area, and most of the people here have had it with the liberal govt-especially in local government. They actually lost their very safe seat at Pittwater, which should have been a shoe in.They lost to Independent.Manly is also independent.
I too have lived other countries that are piss holes, and love australia-it is my first home .But I do not believe John Howard has any thing that is truly excellent to offer as a leader,besides using the divide and conquer method-he seems very adept at that. But at the local government level even liberal safe seats are in danger -people arent willing to have the mandate mirrored in their local community.

Buy a dictionary, look up the meaning of the word MANDATE!!!!!!

Three elections, growing majority at each election. consistent higher polling over the opposition. Look up the word DEMOCRACY in the dictionary.

And while your at it, try talking to the average Australian. Not the chardonay socialists who shout a lot, or the Unionists who protest a lot.

i mean the people who pay the taxes that keep Australia going, who allow their children to join the Forces to keep it safe.

You might just learn something....