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#100579 - 28 May 09 08:25 How to behave on the Interwebs
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
stolen from another forum, but mostly applicable here, too ... except maybe no. 6. admins can go to buggery.




  1. Flame Wars
    By-and-large, the trouble with The Internet, and forums in particular, is that everyone gets to be anonymous. That essentially gives them free reign to be as snooty and argumentative as they like.
    A ‘troll' posts deliberately controversial or annoying messages for the specific purpose of getting a rise out of people and initiating a hate-filled and overly-argumentative thread. The appropriate course of action is simply not to respond. Don't feed the troll.
  2. Godwin's Law
    Godwin's Law states that “as an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches one.”
    What that means in real terms is that sooner or later someone involved in a forum argument will be likened to a Nazi, or displaying Hitler-like tendencies. Please note that if you're the one invoking Godwin's Law and likening someone to a Nazi, you've immediately lost the argument because it's such a lame-a** low blow.
  3. Fanboys
    Approximately 99.9% of all online forums are based around videogames. Sadly, there are several members of the videogame community who have such an overly-fanatical devotion to their particular console that they're somehow incapable of admitting any other system might have good features too. They're best ignored, because ‘Fanboys' are basically a special subset of ‘Troll', and as such are all Nazis and/ or Hitler.
  4. Teenagers
    Sadly, teenagers are allowed on The Internet too. They have funny ways of spelling and don't understand that proper grownups don't want to put up with their pubescent attempts at ‘humour'. There's nothing you can do about Teenagers on The Internet, you'll just have to learn to circumnavigate them.
    Not all teenagers are evil, mind. Just most of them.
  5. Post Count
    Every time you post, your post count goes up by one. Some people seem to think that the higher the post count, the more worthy and valuable they are to society at large. Frankly, the exact opposite seems to be the case; posting just to up your count is insanely annoying, so make sure all your messages add to a discussion in some way. If you're replying in a thread, make sure what you're writing is funny, interesting or funny and interesting. “yeh i agree lol” is not, in any way, shape or form, a valid reply, ever.
  6. Respect the Admins
    It's their website, and they can do whatever the hell they like with it. You're a guest, and hassling them about how they run things is akin to going round your Auntie's house and curling one out in her tea-pot.
  7. DON'T USE ALL CAPS IN YOUR POST
    EVER. ‘Shouting' through the written word is pointless and annoying, clearly.
  8. Lurk Before Posting
    Don't just jump in to the forums spouting off reams and reams your amazing knowledge of the intricacies of World of Warcraft. In Binary.
    Lurk around a bit first and read some threads to see whether or not that's even remotely the sort of thing people there would be interested in.
  9. Keep On Topic
    If a thread's all about how amazing a new 2D Sonic the Hedgehog game would be, don't derail it and start talking about something else entirely, like Chun Li's thighs. Make a new thread if you absolutely must.
  10. Picture Etiquette
    Don't post massive pictures that are wider than most peoples' screens. What's more, don't post massive pictures of filthy grotty porn or anything in case people are at work. Not even the most ardent heterosexual likes looking at boobies when sat near their boss. It's enough to put them off for life.
  11. NSFW
    What's more, make sure you mark any risqué links as Not Safe For Work, just in case, and make sure doing so is in keeping with the forum's tone.
    By and large, just remember to be excellent to each other. Be all civil and pleasant. Keep your tongue firmly in your cheek and get a nice thick skin.


    BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
    It turns out there's even more annoying stuff people do that we simply couldn't squeeze into the film...
  12. Signatures
    ...should be small and tasteful. Massive graphics plugging something you're selling are a right royal no-no. Text is very much preferable.
  13. Avatars
    Your profile pic is how people picture you, so choose something good-looking, funny or interesting. Pretty much anything goes, just make sure it isn't ugly or annoying and fits with the tone of the forum.
  14. Gravedigging
    Old threads are old for a reason, and that reason is that noone's interested in discussing that anymore. Unless you've got an outrageously good reason to do so, leave dead threads to Rest in Peace.
  15. Drama
    Used properly, The Internet can be a tool for good. If used for overblown, melodramatic weepy Emo nonsense, it's ruined and needs to be scrubbed clean. Learn to relax and take everything in your stride. Noone's on The Internet to get all stressed and angsty, we're all just here for a good time. So leave all your haughty drivel at the door.
  16. Smilies
    If used sparingly a smiley can emphasise a point: sarcasm comes across extremely poorly in forums – almost dangerously so. A quick winky will sort that. Reams and reams of extravagant animated smileys performing all manner of wacky acts are annoying, and are the sort of thing your mum would do, were she able to use a computer.
  17. Read the FAQ and Forum Rules
    Because they'll tell you how the community there likes people to act. They're there for a reason.
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KuKuKaChu: dangerously too sophisticated

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#100580 - 28 May 09 10:06 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: KuKuKaChu]
bishopslips Offline
Member++

Registered: 05 Jan 09
Posts: 184
Loc: Jakarta
I agree. LOL!
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She fakes orgasms. I fake love.

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#100581 - 28 May 09 10:09 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: bishopslips]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
snigger
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KuKuKaChu: dangerously too sophisticated

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#100582 - 28 May 09 10:21 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: KuKuKaChu]
Vulgarian Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 25 Apr 08
Posts: 2369
Loc: Jakarta
So does rule 3 mean you'll stop going on about Ubuntu?
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I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or fuck it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that.

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#100584 - 28 May 09 11:39 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Vulgarian]
v8dave Offline
Member*

Registered: 08 Nov 05
Posts: 597
Loc: Jakarta Selatan
Rule 9 falls down flat on its face on this forum!! Go check the for sale postings for instance and see what I mean?

snigger
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Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes

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#100586 - 28 May 09 11:43 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: v8dave]
Vulgarian Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 25 Apr 08
Posts: 2369
Loc: Jakarta
Oh come on, they deserve it. Those are some of my favourite threads.
_________________________
I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or fuck it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that.

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#100588 - 28 May 09 11:50 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Vulgarian]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
Quoting: Vulgarian
So does rule 3 mean you'll stop going on about ubuntu?

what do you mean, "going on about Ubuntu"? you trying to start a flame war, you lousy degenerate bule loser??
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KuKuKaChu: dangerously too sophisticated

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#100589 - 28 May 09 11:51 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: v8dave]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
Quoting: v8dave
Rule 9 falls down flat on its face on this forum!! Go check the for sale postings for instance and see what I mean?

i think these "rules" are more serving suggestions.
_________________________
KuKuKaChu: dangerously too sophisticated

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#100591 - 28 May 09 11:54 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: KuKuKaChu]
Vulgarian Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 25 Apr 08
Posts: 2369
Loc: Jakarta
Quoting: KuKuKaChu
Quoting: Vulgarian
So does rule 3 mean you'll stop going on about ubuntu?

what do you mean, "going on about Ubuntu"? you trying to start a flame war, you lousy degenerate bule loser??


Pretty much constantly, yes.
_________________________
I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or fuck it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that.

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#100597 - 28 May 09 12:28 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Vulgarian]
bishopslips Offline
Member++

Registered: 05 Jan 09
Posts: 184
Loc: Jakarta
I think Vulgy's 'never read the comments' advice should be included. However, whilst doing this I came across this gem. Getting angry about about internet insults is bad enough but then we have this...

To who addressed me as faggot…. Sorry I didnt respond to that insightful comment earlier, i was too busy getting paid to write a graphic novel from my house, where i can play xbox, work out, and fuck my girlfriend any time i want…..





Edited by bishopslips (28 May 09 12:29)
_________________________
She fakes orgasms. I fake love.

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#100600 - 28 May 09 12:45 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: bishopslips]
Vulgarian Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 25 Apr 08
Posts: 2369
Loc: Jakarta
_________________________
I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or fuck it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that.

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#100636 - 28 May 09 20:33 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Vulgarian]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
_________________________
KuKuKaChu: dangerously too sophisticated

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#100642 - 29 May 09 01:55 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: KuKuKaChu]
witty handle Offline
Member*

Registered: 11 Mar 08
Posts: 933
Loc: Bogor
to marmz and the rest of the rabble that follow,,,talk about bad losers

http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story?id=650465&sec=uefachampionsleague&cc=4716
_________________________
quips,gibes and irony all form part of my repartee

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#100643 - 29 May 09 02:09 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: witty handle]
Vulgarian Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 25 Apr 08
Posts: 2369
Loc: Jakarta
Plus, Ronaldo loves the cock, yet is startled and ashamed by this fact.



_________________________
I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or fuck it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that.

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#100759 - 01 Jun 09 11:12 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Vulgarian]
Marmalade Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 18 Apr 08
Posts: 2471
Loc: Jak
I have nothing but good to say about Barcelona's win. The greasy Spanish cunts.
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JakartaRestaurantReviews.com


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#100762 - 01 Jun 09 11:21 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Marmalade]
Derek Gratis Offline
Member*

Registered: 30 May 09
Posts: 517
Loc: Proxima Centauri
Top footballing skills from Barca. Sir Alex's hooter never looked so black.
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"Still, I'll say this for Indonesia, the health service is tremendous. As soon as you're ill, they kill you. There's no fucking about with cures."

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#100769 - 01 Jun 09 12:47 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Derek Gratis]
Marmalade Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 18 Apr 08
Posts: 2471
Loc: Jak
Twas truly a sight to behold. He has never looked like his bum had squeaked so much.
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JakartaRestaurantReviews.com


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#102867 - 24 Jul 09 21:18 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Marmalade]
fatbaldbloke Offline
Member

Registered: 24 Jul 09
Posts: 1
Loc: Jakarta
This is my first post so please be gentle.

Internet Forum FACTS:

1.) Typing "FACT" after anything makes it an incontrovertible fact. FACT. (Has to be in capitals though or it doesn't count)

2.) Correct punctuation, grammar and spelling are entirely optional on the internet. FACT. You know what you're talking about; if no-one else can understand you, that's their problem.
Ignore their corrections, taunts, prolonged sessions of explaining the difference between 'they're', 'there' and 'their', and those posts consisting entirely of various punctuation marks with an invitation to treat said post as a punctuation buffet.

3.) Your opinion counts. Oh yes it does. Some maintain that it's worth at least as much as anyone else's. They are actually wrong; your opinion is worth more than anyone else's (including the person who maintains that their opinion is worth more than yours - don't try to figure this one out, it does make sense if you don't think about it).
Have you ever owned/seen/heard/worked on/eaten/drunk/wanked over/talked to/been attacked by the object or person being discussed? No? You'll find that just doesn't matter. Tell the world what you think. At length. People will shout you down, they are unbelievers and must be crushed with your intellect and wit.
But if you have, then your opinion is absolute gospel. You can present it as true, solid hard FACT. Oh, yes. Feel that warm glow. You've just pissed yourself with joy. Doesn't it feel good?

4.) You're safe behind your keyboard. FACT. No-one can trace you. Feel free to taunt people on open forums without risk of any of the following:
- Having your real name and address posted.
- Pictures of your house / car / wheelie bin being posted on the forum.
- Other users of the forum adopting pictures of your house etc. as their avatars.
- The person you taunted turning up at your place of work with a large bag of ring spanners and a tub of anal lube.
- A moderator of the forum turning up at your house stark bollock naked and being photographed standing outside your front door.
There's nothing to worry about, go ahead and say what you like. Call them all "keyboard warriors" - they're cowards who say things from behind their keyboard they would never dare say to your face.

5.) In the unlikely event you find yourself out of your depth in an internet argument, you can just imply that they are "biting" and laugh at them. This wins you almost all arguments. FACT. Any arguments that you still don't win can be quickly finished off by comparing certain people on the forum to Nazis. Hitler=Instant win. FACT.

6.) Smilies are great. FACT. Use as many as you can, it doesn't really matter if you've used the same one three times in the same sentence already - they are there to demonstrate your depth of feeling, use them to your heart's content. Hundreds and hundreds of the little fuckers, the more obscure the better. Knock yourself out.

7.) "Fail" images mark you as a master debater, along with lolcats. FACT. People love them, especially that one with the containers falling off the "failboat". That's fucking hilarious that one. Or any iteration of the Failcopter - everyone loves that.

8.) Irony is just like gold-ey or bronze-y only it's made of iron. FACT.

9.) Mentioning how much you earn / what flash car you drive / how high-powered your job is will earn you great respect amongst your peers. FACT. Feel free to make these up, no-one will know (see 4.) above). If photographic evidence is requested, just post two pictures of your pretend house/girlfriend/Quattro/place of work found somewhere else on the Internet. They will be accepted at face value by all.

10.) LOL means "Laugh Out Loud" apparently. Of course, laughing out loud while sat at your computer is not an actual pre-requisite for the use of "LOL", that was just a fact. Not a FACT, just a fact.

And remember - Ive had all ur Mums. FACT.

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#102870 - 24 Jul 09 21:58 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: fatbaldbloke]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
Quoting: fatbaldbloke
This is my first post so please be gentle.

fuck that, fatty! you're a player! no mercy!!
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KuKuKaChu: dangerously too sophisticated

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#102887 - 25 Jul 09 10:22 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: KuKuKaChu]
fred Offline
Member*

Registered: 26 Nov 08
Posts: 743
Loc: here and there
Are these the new forum rules you nazi bastard?
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I have never been convicted of any crime involving sheep.

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#102888 - 25 Jul 09 10:28 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: fred]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
FACT.

eek mad cool smile smile frown frown blush crazy laugh laugh shocked shocked smirk smirk confused grin grin wink wink cry sick sleep tired whistle upyours shoot wank swear yay kuku smashpc help rockon ban love doh jumpall devilyay wave argue drink asslick kiss kiss angel hug shitfan bomb stab dilli tripping snipe :chewwy: lulu banghead popcorn nsfw :ken:
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KuKuKaChu: dangerously too sophisticated

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#106640 - 26 Nov 09 09:19 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: KuKuKaChu]
KuKuKaChu Moderator Offline
Pooh Bah

Registered: 09 Oct 05
Posts: 10790
Loc: Centre of the Universe
From ABC News

Starving trolls is key to internet harmony

By Cassie White

Ignoring internet "trolls" is the best way to deter people who surf the internet picking fights and abusing people on discussion forums, says an expert.

ABC News Online this week scrapped its 'Open for Comment' panel in a bid to deter trolls, who constantly start arguments and hurl abuse at other participants.

The move has been criticised by some people, as has ABC policy to moderate comments before posting them to the site.

The role of moderator is to act as a filter to keep debate civil, constructive and on topic. But some feel it is a form of censorship.

"If you start trying to decide what's worthy of being posted then the comments section will be nothing but an extension of the moderator's ego and opinion (as it is now). Vibrant debate and content worth reading will only thrive under a low censorship policy," said ABC commenter, Az.

But others agree with the idea of moderation.

"I find a lack of civility predominates and on occasions it becomes quite abusive ... My concerns are not about an inability to handle 'robust debate' or the 'emotional nature of things'. It is the deliberate attempts to belittle other people," said News Online reader, Annie.

Dr Jason Wilson, lecturer in digital communications at Wollongong University, says many people like to hide behind the mask of anonymity on the internet.

"It allows you to say things you may not say face-to-face or under your own name because you don't have to take responsibility for those comments," he said.

Reformed troll 'Mozart's Ghost' says many people get into trolling for the "thrill" of it.

"You suss out what bothers particular users, get to know them and their weaknesses and play on them," he told ABC News Online.

"You try and engage them in some sort of debate based on logic when you don't really care. You'll say anything just to get them to waste their time talking to you."

He says more seasoned trolls generally learn how to cleverly word their abuse in order to slip past moderators.

"You've got to be a lot smarter than that - that's level one of trolling," he said.

"You've got to get to level five where you're more subtle and subversive where people don't actually know if you're serious or not. It really mucks with people's minds."

Dr Wilson says crying censorship is a common complaint from trolls.

"There's a number of tried and true tactics that you'll find trolls using - saying something that's completely unacceptable and then immediately resorting to that complaint that they're being censored," he said.

Ironically, Mozart's Ghost is now "on the forces of good" and runs and internet forum.

Don't feed the trolls

He says the best way to make a troll go away is to simply ignore them.

"You can hardly go back into a thread and post if the last post is yours," he said.

"If you just ignore us, it's probably a good tactic because we do want some material we can come back at you with."

Dr Wilson agrees that the best way to take a troll down is to not react.

"People who run blogs and moderate comments need to be firm and not let any of this stuff through," he said.

"The good old motto is 'don't feed the troll'. Don't acknowledge them, don't give them attention, don't react because that's what they want."

He says in his experience, serial trolls tend to be men up to the age of about 30 and sometimes they can take things too far.

"[I've heard about] threats of violence, various kinds of low-level stalking," he said.

"It's something that does happen and people really do go after each other when they're having blog wars and what have you.

"But that happens in the mainstream media as well - people get vilified and attacked by mainstream journos as well, so it's all swings and roundabouts really."

Tags: information-and-communication, broadcasting, abc, internet, australia
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#106642 - 26 Nov 09 09:26 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: KuKuKaChu]
Vulgarian Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 25 Apr 08
Posts: 2369
Loc: Jakarta
What do you reckon, Marmz?
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I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or fuck it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that.

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#106652 - 26 Nov 09 21:58 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Vulgarian]
Marmalade Offline
Pujangga

Registered: 18 Apr 08
Posts: 2471
Loc: Jak
Dunno, my site is like a nun's private parts now. Moderating does strangle the trolls' voices but also never ever underestimate the fact that people repeat view more when there is a popcorn session going on. Just check out Metro Midlife Crisis for proof.
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#106668 - 27 Nov 09 22:21 Re: how to behave on the interwebs [Re: Marmalade]
KaraengLolo Offline
Member+

Registered: 15 Jul 07
Posts: 68
Loc: SulSel
Good thing there's no nsfw material, post counts or Ubuntu raving here
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People know me. I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

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